It has taken me a little bit to process through last week and then into the weekend. I still am. The biggest thing that I noticed is how God prepares you to here a message being taught that weekend at church. It started Tuesday as I was reading Hebrews to kind of prepare myself for bible study the next day. We were getting ready to dive into chapter 8. The writer of Hebrews is trying to show these new christian who are back sliding into the old way and traditions. What has been sticking with me is the whole concept of Jesus as the high priest and how He brought this whole new way to forgiveness. He took this messed up system and made it easy. Took away the flaws and tore down the veil.
Then my pastor gets up and tells us about how before we can forgive we need to forgive ourselves. Suddenly everything from the days before aligned and I realized I rarely seem to seek forgiveness for myself, or really even ask. If Jesus came and made is so easy, why is forgiveness something so hard to do?
Now as we head into the weekend I am excited to hear the next part. To forgive others. As I looked ahead and started to pray through it, when I think about it on the surface I don’t think I hold onto things and I am quick to forgive. In my heart I know of a couple of things I need to forgive someone of, and some of them are not even big things! Maybe I am still processing it, maybe it is not the right time yet, or maybe I have become comfortable in that bitterness and no longer feel the weight of it holding me down.
I will just have to wait and listen.
